Merry Christmas

Puck is really a big softie... or is it just Mark?

Mark Salling is awesome.

He wrote an homage for the Glee cast and crew.

love

One thing I love about the holidays is all sorts of cool, new stuff. Problem is, I have no money to buy things.

Seriously! How cool is this necklace? The LOVE sign using a Hello Kitty head as the "O." That's just about the cutest thing I have seen in a long, long time.

if only this would fit...

I am loving this dress sooooo much. It is the cutest thing i've seen in a long, long time. I love retro dresses. I wish that people made dresses like this in plus size. It would make my life.

world aids day

www.worldaidscampaign.org

More than 25 million people have died of AIDS since 1981.

Africa has 14 million AIDS orphans.

At the end of 2008, women accounted for 50% of all adults living with HIV worldwide, and for 59% in sub-Saharan Africa.

Young people (under 25 years old) account for half of all new HIV infections worldwide.

In developing and transitional countries, 9.5 million people are in immediate need of life-saving AIDS drugs; of these, only 4 million (31%) are receiving the drugs.

black friday

My mom and I decided to brave a couple of stores yesterday. We were not crazy and got up before dawn. We went later in the afternoon and we were on a mission. We went to Old Navy and it was nuts. There were tons of people and the store was a mess. Everything was thrown all over the place. My goal was to find these and I sure did find them. That means I now own HO flips! So happy. We found the flip-flops and got out of that store as soon as possible. Then next 2 stores we went to were actually not bad at all. They didn't appear and busier than usual. We found almost every thing we were looking for and got great deals in the process. I am just glad that we didn't try to do more. All the crowds and chaos are not something I enjoy.
But dude... I have HO flips! So worth it.

daily overdose of hotness

Guess who is on cover of the latest issue of Details?
Apparently, there is an article that goes with the pictures.
goodness gracious

It gets better...


Today was a much better day.

venting

Tonight, after Adam Lambert's performance on the American Music Awards, there was some upheaval online, especially twitter. I have lot more feeling about the subject than I cannot express in 140 characters. My opinion on the performance... dumb, desperate and not good at all. What wasn't good was the singing. His wailing is something I could never get into while he was Idol. He has a great voice, but its not really as rocker as he thinks it is. I heard some of his performances when he was in Wicked and that is what he needs to be doing. When he screeches, it ruins the whole song. The dumb part was him acting like he is this huge superstar already. He thinks he is this rock god. I hate to break it to him, but he was only on Idol. He's not even in the same vain as anyone I would consider a rock star. What was desperate was him grinding all over the dancers and having them crawl over him. Now, I can get into artistic performances, Lady Gaga, but until you have have had a number one hit or even an album in the stores, show the audience your talent, not how you can run around a stage and stick your face in people's crotches. Desperate for attention. That's what that was.
Now the issue that arose on twitter was that many people were saying that the performance was gross and disgusting. People have the right to their opinion, even if they don't phrase that opinion in the most appropriate ways. Seems ridiculous to start attacking those that disagree with you. Do you really think you will change their mind? Its a waste of your time and will only upset yourself when they don't suddenly agree with you. Not worth it. But something worse happened while people were disagreeing about the performance. Some people started accusing others of being homophobic, because they said the performance was disgusting. I get very confused how the leaps are made. Seriously. If I said Jennifer Lopez's performance sucked, could I then be accused of being racist again Puerto Ricans? Just because a person says that Adam's grinding was disgusting does not necessarily have any thing to do with him being gay. I am sure that, for some people, it does. But for the majority of people, including me, his sexuality had nothing to do with it. Why this leap? I still can't wrap my brain around it. Also, that is a lot of pressure to put on Adam. He is just doing his thing and if people expect him to allows represent the entire gay community, people will be disappointed. Its not fair to him. So people, please. I hated Carrie Underwood's outfit, but that does not mean I have issues with blonde girls from Oklahoma.

Relax. Its just entertainment. Not everyone likes the same things. Good thing there are lots of options.

a cute little story

I had forgotten about a cute thing that happened when I was on the east coast, visiting my sister. I remembered today, because my sister was processing some pictures she had taken of her friends family, for their Christmas card. While I was there, we went over to her friends house to visit for a little bit. Her friend has a daughter who will be two very soon. While we were visiting, we were playing with her and I was sitting on the floor. The little girl came up to me, pointed at the tattoo on my foot and said, "What's that?" I told her it was a ladybug and she looked right at me and said, "Why?" She said it in the cutest voice you could imagine. Almost in a sing-songy voice. "Whiiiii?" How could I not laugh? I said to her, "That's a good question, J." Even at that age, tattoos are perplexing.

i must own this!

Finally, there is a Hello Kitty stocking that is not all pink. I love Hello Kitty, but do not like pink. So when there is Kitty stuff that is not pink, I am overjoyed.

obsessed with these

Who wants to buy me these? Oh. They are only $5 at Old Navy? I think I can swing that. Nothing like Christmas flip flops, especially HO ones and candy cane hearts!. Can't wear these in most parts of the country, but I can!

update on last post

This morning, I decided to call Vic. I had to end this stupid limbo. It rang and rang. He never answered or was not home. He does not have voicemail or an answering machine. I let it ring for a long time. I figured if he doesn't have voicemail, he wouldn't have caller id. How would he know that I called? I emailed him. This is what the email said...

I just tried to call you. What I was going to tell to you was that I really didn't have anything to say.
Please do not call me back.
Maybe in the future, if I feel like communicating with you, I will. For now, this is all I can do.

Laura

That really is what I was going to say. In truth, the email was easier than the conversation would have been. It was a lot less stressful for me... as it should be. Who knows what will happen next, but I think I made myself very clear.

not all sunshine and light

My father Vic called me on Sunday. It was the first time I had heard from him since the day before he was moving out of state. That was back in April and he called me to ask if I would help him pack. I said no and that was the last I had heard from him. Then a birthday card showed up in my mailbox (a day late) and it sent me spinning. Not only a card, but a check. It was one of the those really long, mushy cards that you never really read. I didn't read it and still never have. All he wrote was something lame like, Hope you have a Happy Birthday. Love, Dad. As if nothing had happened. As if I hadn't spoken to him in over 6 months. I cashed the check and sent him a simple thank you note. Said "Thank you for the card and check. Love, Laura." I did the right thing by sending him the note. I didn't even have his address until I got if off the return address on the card. Now had I known what would happen after he got the thank you note, I might not have sent it. That is what led to him calling me on Sunday. I didn't answer. It was a number I didn't recognize and I never answer calls from numbers I don't know. I didn't have his phone number either. He left me a message and it was full of crap. "I miss you. I hope I can talk to you." Bullshit like that. I haven't called back. I didn't call back then, because 1. I was watching football and I don't like being interrupted during my Cardinals games and 2. I was feeling sick. Still kinda am. Must be some sinus or something. Even now, though, I don't know if I want to call him or not. Before, it was simple. He doesn't call me, I don't call him. I don't have anything to say to him. Actually, that's not true. And honestly, that is why he hasn't called me. He has told people that he hasn't called me, because I will just yell at him and tell him things he doesn't want to hear. Oh, you mean like you are a dumbass and are screwing up your life by buying a bride from Russia. Stuff like that? Oh hell yes, I will tell him things he does not want to hear. But he should be the parent. And he should be able to listen to what I have to say. Allow me to be honest with him and still be able to maintain a relationship. That is what parents are supposed to do. But I had decided a long time ago, that venting that anger and frustration to him was just a waste of time. Nothing would change. It will only cause me grief. So I have nothing to say to him. I don't want him in my life. Plus, whenever he calls my sister, all his does is talk about himself, his cabinets and his Russian bride. I hear all about it from her. I don't need to hear it from him too. What would I even say to him? He is not worth getting upset over. He is not worth me stressing about this at all. My sister says that I should talk to him. That even though he is a jackass, he's still our father. I don't really buy that. He may be the man who's sperm got my mother pregnant with me, but he hasn't been a father to me in a very long time.

daily dose of hotness - album release day addition

Just pretend that it is still yesterday...

How could I not post a daily dose of hotness on album release day?

Alright, after you pick your jaw up off the floor, lets talk Battle Studies. It was wonderful to wake up and have an album just waiting to be downloaded. That is an awesome feeling. I have listened to the whole album when it was "leaked" last weekend.

Side note: If it is leaked on an official site, like Rhapsody, and with the artists approval, does that even count as leaked? It shouldn't. And so many albums are being leaked before the release date that it just seems pointless to have a later release date. Just put it out earlier. Stupid. I hate when I see that albums are leaked.

Sorry. Got sidetracked there.

So I had heard the album already, but hadn't really listened to it. I really wanted to wait until I had my own copy and could start and stop and play which ever song I wanted. I have been doing that all day. I have to say that, of course, I love it.
Love.
But we knew that would happen. However, I have not yet been able to pick a favorite track. I need to play them more. There are some that I go to play more often, like All We Ever Do is Say Goodbye and Heartbreak Warfare. I think the rest of the album needs more time to stew. I need to learn more of the lyrics first. When I do, I can appreciate the songs more. I am all about the lyrics.

Then tonight, I watched the live show on FUSE and was able to hear some of the new songs live. I fell in love with Friends, Lovers or Nothing. Wow. And I thought Gravity was a great closing song. F,L or N is an amazing song. Don't know if its my favorite, but its up there. I really hope I can find a video of it on youtube. The whole show was great and it was an awesome way to end album release day.

happy birthday to me

Today, I am 32 years old. Being in my 30's ain't nearly as bad as I had expected. But that is probably because I still act like a 12 year old.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

glee

I have yet to discuss on here, my overwhelming love for the show Glee. I will freely admit that I am obsessed with it. However, I really try hard not to read or watch any spoilers. I like to go into the show fresh; not knowing what will happen. However, I came across a clip from next weeks episode and I just had to watch it.

**stop here if you do not want any spoilers**

I had to watch it, because it is Puck singing Sweet Caroline. You heard me! I am so in love with Mark Salling. Puck is my favorite character. He needs to be developed more. I know there are so many characters that its tough to develop them all. Anyway... watch.
This clip brings up many questions... Why does it appear he is singing it to Rachel? Does Quinn really have feelings for him? AUGH!! I never should have watched this, because now I want to search around and find out more. But I will use all my will-power to not do that. I can wait until Wednesday. Can't I?

daily dose of hotness

In honor of his birthday, I am bringing back my daily dose of hotness. Hotness does a body good. This is the cover art for the new album. It comes out a month from tomorrow. Enjoy the view.

Happy 32nd Birthday, Johnny.

i'll be joining that club in 16 days.

who wants to buy me these?

I am obsessing over these clogs. Not like I need more clogs, but these are too cute. Need to own. These need to be mine.

today

Yesterday was bad, but today is a joyful day.
Not only is it the birthday of John Mayer, but it is also the birthday of gorgeous, little Scarlett Aurora Logan.
She was born the day after my miscarriage. From death comes new life. She is my little angel. So, happy 3rd birthday Scarlett.

yesterday

It is so much easier to just sleep thru October 15th and that is what I did yesterday. I stayed up until about 5am, then slept all day been up since about 4pm yesterday. Gonna try to stay awake all day today, so that I can sleep tonight. That should get me back on track.
Sleeping thru yesterday means I did not deal with it. I ignored it. I know that is not healthy, but I think it will get easier over time. I cannot forget waking up around 3:15am on October 15, 2006. I miscarried. It was my first pregnancy and after only 7 weeks it was over. It was the worst day of my life. So this year I chose to ignore it. Not dwell in it. Just skip the day completely. It will get easier, right?

what did i do to deserve this?

Both videos in the same day? Seriously!
Someone take my blood pressure.

Jason Castro - Let's Just Fall in Love Again



John Mayer - Who Says

bleh

Since its tomorrow, I can say that I had a bad day yesterday. I had trouble falling asleep and so I didn't wake up until 3pm. I hate that. I end up getting nothing done. I feel so shitty about it that I just end up doing nothing. When I get up in the morning, I feel like I have time to get going and do things. But not yesterday. I am not making much sense and it feels like a bunch of excuses. I know. I know. I just have a hard time shaking the feelings. It was just a bad day. I try to have fewer and fewer of them.

This post is pointless. Going to shut up now.

how you deal

Good things will happen. Bad things will happen. Sure, you have some control over these things happening. Like don't put yourself in dangerous situations and the likelihood of something bad happens, decreases. Same with the good. But what is more important than all that is how you react to the situation. You need to appreciate when the good things happen. And when the bad things happen, you have to work thru it. You can't let it destroy you. It's all about how you deal. From the largest to the smallest situation.
Trust me, I do not have my shit together. But I have been learning how to function and not let situations control me. I may not be able to stop something from happening, but I can control how I react. One important thing, though... ignoring it and pretending it didn't happen is not dealing with it. The only way out is through.

fear

I choose to not live in fear. I have many reasons why I could be fearful every single day. But for the first time in my life, I am making the conscience decision to not allow this fear to consume me. I am not naive. I understand the danger of the world. What will happen, will happen whether or not I am afraid or not. I feel like this is a sign of strength. I am not allowing those who try to make me afraid, succeed. Be aware, alert, hesitant and cautious. But not afraid.

alrighty then

So changing the blog took a lot less time than I thought. I found a layout that I like very quickly. I like it now. I might hate it in the morning... er, later today. Thoughts on the new look?

towards the future

I have been debating a lot lately over whether or not to keep this blog. I figured that I am always posting on twitter or facebook, why keep this update too? I had to decided to dump it after all these years. But tonight, I had a change of heart. I decided that instead of dumping the whole thing, I would revamp it. Give it a face lift. More like a major over-hall. My plan for the next couple days is to make this blog more me. Not that it wasn't me before, but it needs to be the me I am today. I hope that if anyone still reads this, they will be ok with the change. I need to make this a place I am more comfortable writing. I need to write more. I need to use more than 140 characters to express myself. And I already have this place, so I'm gonna make it cozy and start using it again.

debut single

Earlier this week, I posted a couple pictures of Jason Castro and was totally unable to speak at the moment. Its been a crazy week and only now have I gotten around to explaining myself. Well, those gorgeous pictures don't really need an explanation. They can stand all on their own. Who would be able to speak after seeing them? Not any female with a pulse.
Getting distracted...
Alright. The story behind the picture is that Jason Castro has released his first single off his debut album. The picture is the cover for the single. Its amazing. As of now, November 17th is the album release date. In the mean time, please go to jasoncastromusic.com to hear it. The song is called Let's Just Fall In Love Again. You can also pre-order the album and when you do, you automatically get an mp3 of the single. I would really love to hear what you think of the song.

And yes, I am pimping for Castro. It's my job. If only I could get paid for it.

its that time of year again...

IT'S FOOTBALL SEASON!! Well, pre-season to be exact.
Ok, so pre-season actually started last week.
Whatever. You know what I mean.
My favorite time of year.
Last week, the Cardinals lost in their first pre-season game against the Steelers. I'm just gonna pretend that didn't happen. It means nothing that you lost your first game against the team you lost to in the Super Bowl.
Tonight is the first home pre-season game and I have a good feeling about it. The Cardinals love playing at home and the fans love them. I only wish I was there. One day, when I am rich, I will have season tickets.

Cardinals vs Chargers - 7pm PST

Get ready for Cardinals posts for the rest of the year!
yipee!!!!

black and white or color

either way, she is the cutest!!!

Colbie - 16 months

who wants to buy me these shoes?

I am so in love with these.

sertiughadfjgadfkjghagh

^^^ that means i cannot speak...



more on this tomorrow...

trip pictures

Last week, Chris & I went to Las Vegas. We went so that Chris could attend 2 different conferences. I tagged along and did my own thing while he was at the conferences. Here are my pictures from the trip:

click picture to see the rest

On our way home, we stopped at the Hoover Dam. It was so damn(hehe) cool. Here are my pictures from our time there:

click picture to see the rest

p.s. Flickr is having problems, so if they don't load try them again in a few minutes.

song in my head 08/08/09

Wake Up by Sliimy (pronounced Slim-ee)

glasses picture posting fail

I picked up my new glasses today. I am very excited. Last week when I posted a picture of my new glasses, I knew they didn't look quite right. Now that I have the new ones, I know why... I found the wrong frames. They looked similar because of the bling on the sides. I didn't remember the frame number, so I just started looking at the brand to try to find them. So, I had previously posted the wrong picture. I'll get a picture of myself wearing them soon enough, but for now I'm gonna post a picture of the right ones.See? They are much cooler than the ones I posted by mistake.

random to do list

TO DO before we leave for Vegas (Sunday):

- give myself a mani (trim, file, buff & paint red)
- 2 1 load of laundry
- fold underwear
- decide what clothes to pack
- go to dentist for another upper impression for my night guard
- pick up new glasses
- buy snacks for the road
- load & charge ipod
- more research on cheap places to eat
- pack

Posting this here helps me remember what I need to do.

mad men yourself

If I was my age in the 60's...

do it yourself: http://madmenyourself.com

eye doctor

Today was yet another doctor visit. One more tomorrow... and its the girly doc for the girly exam. Hip, hip, hooray. I made all these doctor appointments for this week, because I have my mom's car. She is out of town and she let me use her car while she is gone. Normally, if I need to make an appointment, I would have to take Chris to work. It's a total pain in the ass. So I am taking full advantage of having 2 cars. Anyhoo. Went to the eye doctor today for my annual exam and to get new glasses. My current glasses are falling apart. One side is held together by a wire where the screw should be. The paint on the inside at my temples has chipped off, and the metal turns my face green. I have to paint over it with clear nailpolish to keep that from happening. Also, some of the bling on the sides have fallen off. They are 2 1/2 years old. So, I get there early so that I can look at all the frames before my appointment. I didn't know if she was going to dilate my eyes or not. Its hard enough to look at frames without my glasses on, then add dilated eyes and its tough to see at all. Before they called me back, I had it narrowed down to 3 pair, but really leaning toward one pair. The doctor tells me that my astigmatism has shift, especially my right eye. So my prescription changed a lot. She said that can happen and there is not reason why. Whatever. Everything else is good. She actually didn't dilate my eyes, which was good. After the appointment, I decided on my glasses. Here they are:
The picture does not look very cool, but they are. I like them a lot. I hate that I have to wait a week to get them!!

dentist. grrr

I had my first dentist appointment in a couple of years, today. I stopped going, because our old dentist office was by our old apartment. That is over 25 miles away. Chris found a new dentist near his work and that was the dentist I went to see today.
There was good and bad at the dentist...
BAD: More cavities than I feel like saying. Slightly embarrassed about that. I have to get a crown over the tooth that I had a root canal on. After the root canal, the dentist just gave me a filling, instead of a crown. Now that filling has cracked, so I need a crown. I should have gotten the crown in the first place. So, crown and cavities. Plus... I grind my teeth and have issues with my jaw. When I open my mouth wide, my jaw locks. Sometimes so much that I have to hold on to it and pop it back in place. Most of the time it goes back itself, but it does slide back and forth and pops when it closes. If I keep my mouth open too long, my jaw hurts terribly. The dentist took a bite impression that just about killed me. I had to sit there with the stuff hardened and I was seconds away from grabbing the dentist's arm to make it stop, when he took it out. They also got impressions for a top and bottom night guard. It will help with the teeth grinding, but he said it should also help my jaw. They also did a test for TMJ. The dentist only glanced at the results, but he said that it didn't look as bad as he thought it would. That's a good thing. Mainly because he said that if the night guard doesn't work, then he would have to refer me to a specialist and the typical treatment is surgery. grrr. No thank you. So, filling and crowns and night guards. Oh my.
GOOD: This is the first dentist (or doctor for that matter) that has ever cared about my jaw issue. I am not sure if the treatment plan is gonna work, but at least someone cares to try to help me with it. Also, I feel like this dentist is much smarter than the last one we had. Chris is really happy with him and I was today too. We shall see. Trying to stay positive here.

look at this little chunky monkey!!

gotta love her..

Colbie - 14 months

SHE LIVES!!

me to my sister: Why do you always call me when I am watching Jonas?

After that short, random comment, let me explain why I haven't blogged in ages. Actually that comment does explain why. Twitter. Blogging in 140 characters or less. For so many people (me included), blogging has become micro blogging. How to say what you need want to say in short sentences. Straight to the point. Not repeating the same sentence in a different way. (Geez I'm silly.) But honestly, twitter is not the only reason.
My dad, father, sperm donor can still read my blog. I didn't want to share anything too personal about my life, because I felt like he didn't deserve to hear about it. I still feel the same, but I am been giving him too much power over me. My stats show that he doesn't even check here anymore. So if he's not thinking of me, why should I worry what he reads?
For the faithful people that do still check here occasionally, I want to bring you up to speed.
- Still unemployed. Grrrr
- Still loving Jason Castro. Music is coming really soon.
- Went to San Diego to meet my friends in real life. Amazing time. Love them even more now.
- Went to Ohio for Chris's sisters wedding. It was a great wedding. Nice to see the family. Bachelorette party. Drunk. Fun. I took tons of pictures. See them here.
I think that's it. I have been traveling a lot and I really like that. I wish I could travel all the time. I also think I just really like getting out of the house when I can. With having only one car right now, I spend 95% of my life in the house. I would walk, but its too fucking hot right now. I started walking early morning at the very beginning of summer, but now even the mornings are 90+.
Not much else has been really going on with me. But if you have been reading my blog in the past, you know that I blog about the most random things. So, I am gonna get back on track with it. Still gonna tweet, but I have a lot of nothing to say.

Oh and by the way... I actually was watching Jonas when I wrote this.

more peach tree

I am so in love with my peach tree. I know that sounds crazy, but its true.
Took a new picture of the babies today...

see them just 11 days ago. my how they've grown!

today is the 1st day of summer

meeting Jason Castro

Chris and I were in LA on Saturday, for a convention. Before we headed home, we went to Santa Monica. We walked on the pier and then went down to the water. After almost losing my shoe in the ocean, we decided to go get something to eat. We found a strip of stores and restaurants. We turn into the parking lot behind the stores and I see Jason Castro walking thru the parking lot. I grabbed Chris's arm and was like OMG! THAT'S JASON! JASON CASTRO! Chris tells me to get out of the car and do something. I think I was in too much shock to move. So I opened the door right there, in the middle of the parking lot. I was lucky that I still had my camera in my pocket from being at the beach. He is past our car by now, so I get out and walk over towards him and say, "Jason." He turns around and smiles.
I said, "I saw you walking by and just wanted to meet you and introduce myself."
He puts out his hand to shake my hand, I shake back.
me: "I am Laura and I am one of the creators of the Goth Girls site."
JC: "Oh. Oh yeah? Nice to meet you."
me: "I saw you here and couldn't not say hello, even though I am still wet from the beach."
JC: "The beach. I think that's what we're gonna do next. I was just out here feeding the meter."
me: "So you live around here, right?"
JC: "Yeah." Lifting his arm and pointing towards the general southern direction. "Over in... there."
me: "So, like, in the Santa Monica area."
JC: "Yeah. What about you?"
me: "I live in Phoenix, actually."
JC: "Oh. So you're just here for a visit, then?"
me: "Yeah, just for today."
me: "So you've been really busy lately."
JC: "Yeah, been working really hard on the album."
At that moment I am looking behind me to see if Chris was coming back. I kept hoping he would, because I didn't know how else to get a picture with him. So as he is saying that, a random guy walks by us. I stop him and ask him if he would mind taking our picture. He was super nice and said that he would. I don't even know if I turned the camera on before giving it to him, but I know for sure that I did not show him how to use it.
After we take the picture...
JC: "I gotta get back to eat."
me: "It was really great to meet you. Thanks."
JC: "You too. No problem."
He was really nice. Smelled good. Even with the 2 week old beard, he was just as smiley as ever. I am so lucky to have met him. I mean, what are the odds? I am really lucky to meet him the way I did, too. We were able to have a small conversation and it wasn't just a quick 2 seconds. I am not discounting people meeting him that way, but recognizing how lucky I actually was.

words escape me

When I am able to write in complete sentences, I will tell the story. But for now... here's me and Jason Castro.

*dead*

Congrats!

My sister-in-law, Linda is graduating today from Ohio University with a Masters Degree in International Studies with a concentration in Latin American Studies and a certificate in Teaching English as a Foreign Language. woo hoo!

peaches!!

I finally decided I needed to take a picture of the peaches on my dwarf peach tree. I have 5 baby peaches. There might be more, but these are the only ones I can find so far.
Even if they are not edible, I am so excited to watch them grow.
This is the blossom that the peaches came from. You can see the little buds in this picture. This was the first bloom on the tree.

taken March 22, 2009

just felt like sharing

I am finally watching The MTV Movie Awards and I'm fast forwarding thru most of it. What I have been wondering for awhile now and even more after watching this show: Why do Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart ask like they are so tortured? They are rich, famous and in one of the most popular movies of last year. I know that all of those things don't guarantee that one would be happy, but you don't have to act like you hate promoting your movie. They appear to resent their fame. Maybe being thrust into the limelight has made their lives difficult. I get that. But still. The whole tortured teen thing is obnoxious. Gimme a break. Life is too damn short to act like that.

p.s. I really like Twilight and will be seeing the rest of the movies.

more DMB

After watching DMB on Jimmy Fallon, I learned that they are gonna be on the Today show on Friday morning. Set that to record too. What a great week!!

grux

My cup runneth over with joy right now. I know that I have a lot of drama and not so great things in my life, but so far June has been amazing. And I honestly owe it all to music. More specifically, the Dave Matthews Band. Watching the concert on TV last night, reminded me, not only how much I love them, but how much music fuels my soul. During the course of the concert, I cried, I laughed, I cheered, I screamed... I experienced so many emotions. It sounds crazy, but it really renewed my spirit. It took being reminded of what I've been missing out on to make me realized what I needed all along. Music that brings me all the emotions that you should experience. In DMB, I feel joy and carefree , but I also feel loss and sadness. But the joy always overcomes the sadness. That is how Dave writes and the music that accompanies it too. Horrible things happen, but celebrate we will...cuz life is short, but sweet for certain.

I am listening the new album, Big Whiskey and the Groogrux King, right now. Groogrux sounds crazy, but not when you find out that Groogrux was LeRoi Moore's nickname. It's been less than a year since his death and it still feels so raw. For the band and even for me. Just thinking of him still brings me to tears. I hear his absence in the music and seeing him not there leaves a huge hole. But again, the joy of who LeRoi was help overcome the sadness of his absence.

The opening track of the album is a solo that was recorded before he died. I share with you, Grux.

grey street

I really forgot how much I love this song. And its so perfect for my life right now.


Oh look at how she listens
She says nothing of what she thinks
She just goes stumbling through her memories
Staring out onto Grey Street
And she thinks...hey
How did I come to this
I dreamed myself million times around the world
But I can't get out of this place
There's an emptiness inside her
And she'd do anything to fill it in
And though it's red blood bleeding from her now
It felt like cold blue ice in her heart
When all the colors mix together
To grey
And it breaks her heart

You know she wishes it was different
She prays to God most every night
Although she knows well He doesn't listen
There's still a hope in her He might
She says I pray
Oh but my prayers, they all fall on deaf ears
Am I supposed to take it all myself
To get out of this place
Oh there's a loneliness inside her
And she'd do anything to fill it in
And though it's red blood bleeding from her now
It felt like cold blue ice in her heart
She feels like kicking out all the windows
And setting fire to this life
She would change everything about her
Using colors bold and bright
But all the colors mix together
To grey
And it breaks her heart
It breaks her heart
To grey

cool things this week

MONDAY: Dave Matthews Band concert streaming live on hulu.com right now. But it is also going to be FUSE tonight. I have it set to record so I can watch it on my big screen too.

TUESDAY: New DMB album, Big Whiskey and the Groogrux King (the 1st album without LeRoi. don't talk about it. it will make me cry.), comes out. Already have the single and have the album pre-ordered on itunes.

TUESDAY: Season 4 of Prison Break comes out on DVD. Already have it pre-ordered on Amazon.

WEDNESDAY: DMB on Jimmy Fallon.

THURSDAY: John Mayer Trio (!!!!) on the Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien. Guess that means John will be back from Kyoto by then.

Set your DVR's and open your itunes. Enjoy the fun with me.

who wants to buy me this?

Hostess Cupcake Coin Purse

Freaking awesome. Cutest thing ever.

swimming with the fishies

Last weekend, while my sister was in town, her, me and my mom went to an aquarium. The aquarium is at the Wildlife World Zoo and is open in the evening, even after the zoo is closed. It has only been open since December and is the only aquarium in the state of AZ. Anyway... point being... I took lots and lots of photos. Not great ones, but ok. If you'd like to see them, click on the picture below.
upside down jelly fish

funny shit

I am not hopping on the Kradam crazy train, but watch this from 1:19 to 1:34. I am laughing so hard that I am crying. I keep watching it over and over and it cracks me up every single time.
When they start cracking up, I just can't stop from laughing.

art is good for the soul

I have recently found an artist that I am really into, Renee French. I love this one, especially:

Check out her blog, here

me, today

Ghost town on a Tuesday night
That ok I'm feelin' alright
It's easier to grab a beer
Without a thousand people here
Talkin' to a friend of mine
Ask him man
He'll say he's just fine
Talk of songs and inspiration
Dreams and financial desperation

I wonder where I'll be in a year
Probably be sittin right here
But if you know the answer
Don't tell me anyone
I don't wanna know

Well I don't wanna know

We've been saying we're going go somewhere
For a long long time
Nothing ever happens
Why's it never happen

Ya We've been prayin' we're going get somewhere
For a long long time
But it never happens
Why's it never happen

I wonder where I'll be in a year
Probably be sittin right here
But if you know the answer
Don't tell me anyone
I don't wanna know

Cause I don't wanna know

suck

I went to the endocrinologist last week and found out that all the weight I lost last year, I have gained back. Not all of it, but 90% of it. I knew that I had, but seeing the scale was a different story. Totally depressing. What's even worse, the new wedding ring that I got for our 10th anniversary does not fit anymore. I can get it on, but it is way too tight. My old one still fits, so I am wearing that now. And my clothes still fit, because I am a few pounds less still. But its a slippery slop. I gotta get back on track. I lost weight last year, I can do it again. I have to do it again.
suck.

right now

What I should be doing...


What I am actually doing...

top 3

bleh. East coast feed. Don't wanna know, stop now.

Gokey - Dance Little Sister - Picked by Paula. Boo. Sounds terrible. Skatting with the saxophone. Someone save me. Randy crawls up his ass again. They talked about his dancing. What does that tell you? Nothing really good to say about the singing.

The judges messing around during and in between songs is just plain rude.

Kris - Apologize - Picked by Randy & Kara. Why they gotta make me think of Archuleta? WOW. He sounds so good. It actually took my breath away when he started singing. I am sitting here with my hand over my mouth, because I don't really know what to say. Kara wanted him to "make it his own"??? It was perfect for him just the way it was. Standing ovation for Simon Cowell. He called Kara out for choosing the song and then saying he should have changed the arrangement.

The judges are disrespectful and rude. I hate them. I hate this stupid show. The contestants deserve more.

Adam - One - Picked by Simon. Awesome. This kid can do no wrong. Simon booed at Randy's comments. Love it. Lambert's got this in the bag.

Speaking of that... Did you notice there was no Idol Gives Back this season?? Dumb.

Gokey - You Are So Beautiful - Arrangement sucked. Sounded terrible. The gospel part. Way to play to your fan base. Thank goodness he's done.

Kris - Heartless - SHUT UP! That was even before he sung. He's got balls. And damn... he actually pulled that shit off. I loved that version. He is a white dude, with a guitar singing a rap song. I am still in shock. He deserves to be in the finale.

Adam - Cryin - DAMN! FIERCE! The backup singers are too loud. And I am not too keen on the way they chopped the song. But he sung the shit out of that song.

I have to say that Simon redeemed himself in my eyes tonight. Not just because I agree with him. But because he was the most respectful to the contestants. He was honest and even when he wanted to, he didn't kiss ass.

Should I vote? Nah. I don't care THAT much.

come back to me

While we wait all day for the Top 3 to perform on Idol, I want to discuss David Cook's latest video for Come Back To Me. First off, I really like this song. I have from the very beginning. Secondly, I know I am way late in discussing this video. I know its been out for a few weeks, but I keep forgetting to discuss it. In case you haven't seen it, here it is:

Ok. So he sings it backwards. Been done. And been done WAY better. In my opinion, the backwards singing is very distracting. And the backward motion just seems odd. I think its an easy way out. When they have no other idea for a video concept, they do it backwards. Whatever. But the one good thing I have to say about this video is that it highlights DC's best asset... his mouth. I am a fan. Think he's not bad looking. I have always thought that he has a nice mouth. It was the first thing I noticed about him. I like to watch him sing because of it.
What do you think of the video?

everything old is new again

When I was in junior high and high school, I lived in Flojos. I honestly do not know why I ever stopped wearing them. I am thinking moving out of state had something to do with it. But when I used to wear them, I wore them like mad. I used to wear out a pair, until it was falling apart, then buy a new pair. Then, after I moved from AZ to OH, I started wearing Birkenstocks. They are still my primary footwear, but tonight I was online looking for a pair of black flip flops. Suddenly, flojos popped into my head. I wondered if they even still made them. Then I found them and I was damn excited. I ordered my standard black pair. They now have brown and offwhite. I might have to get them too. But I started with my old standby. I am very, very excited for them to arrive.

song in my head 05/11/09

Waking Up in Vegas - Katy Perry

who wants to buy me this?

Yeah, I know its $160, but its Hello Kitty dressed in donuts. Its like my dream come true.

happy mother's day