about last week

The week with our friends from Indianapolis ended with a major reality check for me. We (being me & Chris) had been getting strange vibes from them, like they weren't having fun. But then they would say that they were. We really couldn't get a read on how they felt about us and being here. I really wanted to show them as much as I could of Arizona as possible. So I made lists of things we could do and I planned that awesome trip that those pictures below are from. But still, strange behavior. Apparently it was me. All me. That was the problem. I overstress and overplan. No one said this directly to me, but was inferred and not denied. I mentioned, while we were at lunch on Thursday, that I was a total bitch (referring the air freshener that Chris bought me) and Chris said that he read a book at one of the bookstores about my sign, Scorpio. And it said that I was controlling and selfish and all sorts of other stuff. Chris was joking around and said that I was just like my sign. The response I got to that was - they looked at each other in a look that was agreement and never said a word. What the hell! So, it got me thinking. I really am that way. I just live in this constant state of denial. And having reality slap me in the face just isn't my idea of a good time. I broke down on Thursday night, after we got back. I cried myself to sleep. There are a lot of reasons why I realized that I was the problem. They also have a friend who lives in Phoenix who one of them used to work with. They wanted to go out with him and we had no problem with that. But the thing is, they were soooo tired and wanted to go home when we were driving thru Mingus Mountain and Prescott Valley. Then, we get home and they go out with that guy and are out until 1am. I thought you were tired? It was like the first chance for them to get away from me, they jumped at it. Whatever. I realized that I want other people to act like I do. I treat others like I want to be treated and it NEVER HAPPENS. It sounds like I am being really hard on myself and I understand that it's not all my issues that made the week strange. But I don't like how I am. I don't want to be in denial of how I really think and feel. I really wanted the week to end, but I also didn't want to go back to my life. I wasn't happy in either. I need to do some serious thinking about myself.

I sounds like I didn't have any fun. But that's not true. I tried to make the best out of a bad situation. We went lots of fun places while they were here. Here's a break down...

Friday -
food: Red Brick Pizza
Arizona Mills Mall

Saturday -
Taliesin West
Cosanti
food: El Paso BBQ

Sunday -
food: IHOP
South Mountain park
food: Rosati's

Monday -
The Heard Museum
IKEA

Tuesday -
The Grand Canyon
Arizona Mountain Inn(the cabin we stayed in)

Wednesday -
Oak Creek Canyon
Slide Rock
Sedona
food: Oak Creek Brewery
Red Rock State Park
Cottonwood
food: Blazin M Ranch

Thursday -
Jerome
RAKU Gallery
food: Jerome Brewery
Jerome State Historic Park
Mingus Mountain
Prescott Valley

See? We did lots of cool stuff. So for that, I am really happy. And I have a billion pictures I need to sort thru.
I will be ok.